While the holiday spirit still hangs in the air, the American people should badger their elected officials to get serious about Affirmative Action. Despite hundreds, if not thousands, of lawsuits filed on behalf of minorities and other special interest groups, little progress has been made to level the playing field in a country that still discriminates. The best way to assure equality in all walks of life is to apply a formula — simple and enforceable — one that forever will eliminate subjectivity and fuzzy guidelines. Here’s a shrewd plan that’s eminently fair: Apportion all jobs, posts, assignments and other positions based on the national census. If you will, let’s call it Census Cleansing. For example, 12 percent of all citizens are Black. Under this plan dedicated to total justice, the Los Angeles Lakers basketball team would have 2 Black players. The rest of the roster would consist of 2 Hispanic, 10 White and 1 Asian. The Dallas Cowboys football team would take the field with 42 Whites, 7 Hispanics, 7 Blacks and 4 Asians. Why has it taken so long for us to put teeth into true Affirmative Action? This solution is destined for acclaim. In fact, it should be ratified as the 28th Amendment to the Constitution. No doubt, some malcontents will condemn this brilliant idea as an affront to Liberty. They will offer the same tired arguments — weak, emotional pleas about the sanctity of talent, the worth of experience, the fairness of qualifications. Inconceivably, these people refuse to admit that all persons are not created equal. That some are born with greater physical gifts, mental acuity and economic advantages. That some are born to families that give them an edge, while others are abused and disadvantaged. We must mitigate these inequalities with adoption of CAAA — the Census Affirmative Action Amendment. Under this humanitarian plan, the University of Michigan would mandate that 12 percent of its student body and faculty must be Black. (Goodbye, controversy). Only 24 of the 32 National Football League head coaches could be White. The black robes of the Supreme Court would cloak only 8.4 Whites. Would CAAA leave behind deserving individuals? Certainly. But society as a whole will benefit as we give the disadvantaged a chance to develop. For instance, of the top 150 professional golfers, 6 should be Asian and 18 should be Black. That is not the case now nor can it be unless we make it happen. On the other hand, since Tiger Woods is both Asian and Black, maybe we’re better off to leave well enough alone.

We live in an increasingly complicated world. Physically, life is much easier. More people have more things, more leisure and better health. Times are easy for some, disaster for others. On balance, the fabric of society seems in tatters, from the highest office in the land to the simplest life on Elm Street. Hundreds of “Help Organizations” are doing a brisk business to combat crime, drugs, broken homes and broken lives. The stress is palpable. Ask Dr. Phil or your favorite shrink. In troublesome times, or any time at all, a little age-old wisdom is wonderful tonic for a good life.

DESIDERATA
Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be; and whatever your labor and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. M.Ehrmann. 1927

Every thousand years or so somebody comes along to utter the unthinkable truth and risk crucifixion. With rare exception, we deny, avoid and ignore the truth because it threatens us. It challenges our prevailing beliefs and exposes the demons that live within us all. Of all God’s creatures, we are the only ones that can’t stomach the truth. So you might as well get out the Pepcid now. Given birth by perhaps the most divinely inspired political document in recorded history, America pays homage to God. We base our freedoms on the principle that our Creator has endowed us with specific inalienable rights. We erect churches and temples throughout our largest cities and in our smallest hamlets. Above all else, we worship Almighty God. Sorry to tell you, Pilgrim, this declaration is a blatant lie. The truth is we Americans worship the Almighty Dollar, not a Heavenly Father. Money is everything, an all–consuming passion. At best, God is in third place behind money and television, the twin rulers of our land. The evidence is staggering. Parents leave their children in institutions to earn money for material “essentials,” like SUVs, implants, plasmas, Caribbean cruises and Starbuck’s. Gluttonous corporate execs rape their companies and fellow workers. Spouses murder spouses and children murder parents for the insurance proceeds. Sibling heirs fight in court and become sworn enemies. Money is the motivation for almost all crime. Speaking of which, the federal government has only one purpose — to siphon money. States want more. Cities want more. Professional athletes will do anything and go anywhere for another million bucks; being highest paid is the only measure of success. Collegiate athletics is about bigger conferences and greater TV revenues. Meanwhile, Vegas proudly markets sin. Poker, porn and drugs rake in billions. Wealthy business owners risk health and life chasing the world for one more dollar. The Church always has money on its mind, lusting to grow, to build congregations and sanctuaries and stature. Charity is a money machine that ingeniously fuels more need, not less. Lotteries feed on greed. In the thoughtful lyrics of Kerry Livgren, we know that “all our money won’t another minute buy.” But, Kerry, we want to enjoy the minutes we do have and that means we want all the stuff only money can buy. We want to do and go as we please and then we want more of the same. We want total comfort, total control and total security for now and evermore. Money is the stuff of life. When we have lots of it, we feel like Gods. Untouchable. Confident. It is simply common sense that we must worship the Almighty Dollar. We do trust that God is out there and we do have faith — sort of; but life is here and now. We’re not absolutely, positively sure what comes later, are we? If we were dead certain, we would have more in common with some Muslims. They blow themselves and others up because they truly believe in Almighty Allah and they hate all people who worship money and what it can buy. Which means they hate just about everybody and everything. Which means we will always be at war defending the Almighty Dollar. Of course, none of us can know if God really minds playing second fiddle. At least not now. Let’s worry about that later. For now, life beckons. As Abba sang: Money, money, money; Must be funny, in the rich man’s world. Money, money, money; always sunny in the rich man’s world. Aah-ahaaa, all the things I could do If I had a little money. It’s a rich man’s world.