Well, well, well. More than a few pundits have agreed with Fodder that we are a nation deeply, steeply divided. It took them long enough to figure it out. Maybe they got the message when one of the eminent spokespersons on the losing side blurted the “S” word. His anguished tirade on national media went something like this: “We’re the smartest, the brightest, the most enlightened and most creative; we produce most of the art and music; we do most of the work and we pay most of the taxes to make this country run. Something’s seriously wrong when a bunch of Bible toting, right wing fanatics let an ignorant cowboy hijack this country. We have no choice but SECESSION.” Hallelujah, brother! Now you know how the South felt in 1860. But perhaps what you don’t know is that millions of 2004 country bumpkins would gladly grant you a divorce. They would urge you to gather together all of your blue-hearted elite and establish a new United States conceived in socialism — a nation of the government, by the government and for the government. Of course, you would have to adjust for the immigration of millions of your superior followers now living in abject misery among us red-hearted rabble; and we in turn would be bound to accept the millions of Blue State morons whose ignorance would blend in very nicely with the mental deficiency of the Red States. Then again, why go to all this trouble? Secession isn’t necessary. All you have to do is take money off the political battlefield. Because, you see brethren, war is always about the money. If the Feds (and for that matter, states and cities) didn’t have your money to pass around, you wouldn’t be all that concerned whether you elected a cowboy or a gigolo or (heaven forbid) Slick Willie’s bride. Politics, like crime, is almost always about money. Whom you elect president or senator or congressman wouldn’t cause so much hate if it weren’t for the money. The abortion issue wouldn’t cause so much hate if it were a private matter. But, no, abortion rights advocates want government money — your money— camouflaged as taxes — to pay the tab. Hundreds of special interests, including small farmers and private corporations, want your money. Millions of American citizens want your money. Money they haven’t earned. They always vote for the politicians that give them your money. A seat in Congress is worth millions. A Federal job is cradle to the grave benefits. Isn’t this a good time to start over? Whether your loyalty is blue or red, just agree to keep your own money. Then we can all live together peacefully. Otherwise, now indeed may be a good time for the nation’s blue ruling class to secede under a new, blue banner. The rest of us — the dull-witted and miserly — will just have to make out somehow. Somehow.