Pessimism is such a downer. Life is tough enough without being dragged down by malcontents who seem to relish dishing out the gloomiest of prophecies and premonitions. You believe the best way to counter negativity is to deal in  reality. But first you have to listen to the bellyachers. They claim there’s a war against heterosexual, Christian,  white men on the part of African Americans, Hispanic Americans, Muslim Americans, Jewish Americans, Native Americans, Asian Americans, LGBT Americans, Atheists, Women and Educators. According to renowned Wikipedia, these groups do comprise the base of the Democrat Party, but you argue that some white males are Democrats, many women marry white males and at least 20% of public school teachers are white males. Anyway, white males fight wars, like guns, abuse their spouses, own most of the wealth and take advantage of minorities. Reality says white Christian males founded the country. Today, if it weren’t for them, America wouldn’t be catawampus. The crybabies are in a tizzy because the FBI handed Hillary a “get out of jail free” card. Let’s be honest — everybody from time to time makes mistakes. It’s not as if she purposely gave away top secrets to the enemy. She wasn’t trained in IT. The State Department is a huge Agency and no doubt some of her people dropped the ball. If something really bad had happened, there’s not the slightest doubt that Comey and the FBI would have followed the letter of the law. After all, if you can’t trust your own FBI, reality says who can you trust? If you bother listening to Conservative Talk Radio, you will hear incessant grumbling about the GOP Congress not having the spine to impeach the President for overreaching his authority or for its failure to use the “power of the purse” to stop his executive orders. Congress has to remember that the people elected Obama to transform the country. How is this beleaguered leader supposed to do that if small-minded politicians second-guess his every move? Congress would do well to remember that Obama was the first black president of the Harvard Law Review in its then 104 year history. Reality says that achievement alone is worthy of giving him unconditional authority. One of the President’s most bold and stirring initiatives is giving America a transfusion of new immigrant blood — opening borders to millions of Hispanics and Middle East refugees who bring their assets, talents and culture to a country starved for diversity. Yet, every day you must listen to stingy, selfish white Americans  denounce his generosity. These very same Americans deplore the National Debt of 20 trillion dollars while they horde their life’s savings and greedily lobby for lower taxes. In November, if Hillary Clinton becomes President, you can finally bid goodbye to all this pessimism. There will be no need for the negative predictions. She has been in Washington’s front seat for decades; you have seen her performance under fire; you know exactly what to expect. Stop whining. Deal with reality.

Bad news is here to stay. If you don’t believe it, check out country music lyrics. If you don’t believe it, check out the subject lines of your emails and the teaser headlines of political news web sites. Some of the more trite ones are: “You Won’t Believe This;” “Now This Is Scary;” “Shocking Video Blows Lid Off;” ETC. Thankfully, eighty percent of Americans don’t tune in to the gloom and doom chatter. They’re too busy living hour to hour, day to day, making ends meet, moving from pillar to post, looking out for No.1. And who can blame them? They couldn’t care less about Brexit, even if they understand what the word means. Beheading, rape and massacre happen to other people. No skin off their noses if the U. S. military wants to concentrate more on admitting Transgenders into its foxholes than blowing ISIS out of theirs. The National Debt is just a number; health insurance is just a racket, no matter who’s handling it; the economy always stinks, all politicians always lie and the biggest liar of them all gets to run for President. When the time comes to vote, if they have nothing better to do, they pull the lever of whatever party promises the most freebies. But you can lump all the bad news together — worldwide bad news, mind you — and it doesn’t come close to the magnitude of the true crisis that threatens to undermine the very existence of life itself — Erectile Dysfunction. Indiscriminately and relentlessly, ED has swept the country, apparently visiting every household, old, young, rich, poor, black and white alike. The extent of the ED menace can’t be overestimated. The pharmaceutical industry, deeply concerned and sympathetic to the agonizing plight of tens of millions of stricken males, has generously stepped to the plate with phosphodiesterase inhibitors (PDE-5). Just two companies alone invest annually over half a billion dollars in advertising that provides ED awareness and a much needed lift. Unidentified sources now confirm that new research is underway that suggests ED may not be an innate physiological or psychological affliction, but the result of a new virus that may be transmitted through the most innocent human contact. That’s the bad news. The good news is that ED is not  caused (ironically) by STD. Already being called a “21st century plague,” ED may be triggered by a “fossilized” retrovirus — left over from the infection of distant ancestors. Reputable rumor has it that clinical trials now have confirmed a condition that may contribute to the severity of ED cases — a condition that has been diagnosed as PTSD — Pre-Traumatic Stress Disorder. The good news is scientists are attempting to isolate a “super gene” that seems to give certain males absolute immunity to the ED virus. Allegedly, they have identified vigorously immune candidates to volunteer for double blind studies — among them, serial rapists, porn actors and a former U.S.President. Blind studies will also determine if there’s a link between ED and IQ. The good news is, except in cases of PDE-5 overdose, ED has not been shown to induce premature death. But health experts predict the disease could have a debilitating domino effect on the fabric of human intercourse, and thus, on the future of civilization itself. In an extraordinarily contentious election year, the political establishment and the news media are completely oblivious to the ED calamity, and the plight of men who are forced to limp through life. Instead, they remain obsessed with scandal, corruption, terrorism, economic ruin, illegal immigration — and a hopelessly divided nation. Obama continues to sit on a throne. The Supreme Court continues to serve as his administrative assistant. Congress is out to lunch. Hillary walks. And Comey and his FBI colleagues collapse like a cheap tent. The good news — ED sufferers do have Viagra. The bad news — no drug can save America from toxic impotence and corruption.

Cacophony is one of those neat words that looks and sounds like its meaning — uproar, clamor, racket, etc. Not a perfect example of onomatopoeia, but close. At any rate, it’s a good word to describe the pandemonium over the Trump candidacy. The guy created a kind of bedlam by crashing an “invitation only” party. And the hosts are pissed. So are the hosts’ friends, supporters and associates. So are the people at the party across town. They’re equally indignant that this trespasser didn’t have the breeding to know his place.  In unison, both parties and their backers have squawked and bellowed as only lynch mobs can. In opposition, you and your circle of cronies do your homework and quietly chime in from time to time. Most Americans will go to the polls in November without investing so much as a lunch hour to gather and analyze information. Most will follow a mob and obey their long held prejudice. You can accept ignorance. You can accept prejudice as a human tendency — since it afflicts everyone to one degree or another. You can accept the character assassination of Trump by the Democrat syndicate — a well-oiled, very rich machine that happily props up their standard bearer — one Hillary Clinton — the most unethical, untrustworthy, unscrupulous and unworthy candidate in American history. What you can’t accept is treachery — on the part of the GOP political Establishment, GOP Intelligentsia, GOP Media Punditry and various GOP Conservative camps — for their relentless carping and criticism and their denigration and belligerence toward a candidate that bothered to step into the ring in defense of his country. Mitt Romney, showing his true colors, didn’t risk another embarrassment. Sixteen other stellar candidates did take the stage and crossed swords. Trump ran the gauntlet, won and was roundly bashed by his own Party. In stark contrast, not one Democrat lawmaker or civil servant issued a negative peep about their sullied candidate. That comparison tells you all you need to know about the Beltway and why America teeters on the brink. Meanwhile, Trump behaves like the American GI who won WWII. Who is this guy? You know who he is. He’s the loud dude at the party whose voice carries above the music. The voice is boastful and contentious. Nobody likes it, but the dude is rich and money talks. Without the money, the voice would have no friends — except those who know him privately. He’s the dude of whom a close friend might say, “Once you get to know him, you’ll see he’s really a nice person.” Trump always wants to win. Nothing is more American than that. That trait is one that Obama despises most. He’s an exec who runs a multi million dollar business but knows nothing about the waste and inefficiency of insider bureaucracy — of how “things work.” He’s a pragmatist who might be “disruptive” — who might prefer to run the country as a successful business.  He’s the square who actually believes that stuff about “of the people, by the people, for the people.” Trump doesn’t have a governmental record to poke holes in. He hasn’t started wars, increased debt, accepted bribes, let Americans die needlessly in foreign lands or spent taxpayer money on lavish vacations. He has no record of domestic economic failure and is not responsible for world unrest, illegal immigration or rampant terrorism. So the attack dogs must call him names and suggest he’s dangerous. The people who oppose Donald would prefer to elect someone who’s proved she’s dangerous over a guy they claim could be reckless. If Donald Trump is the rogue candidate his own Party says he is, you have a suggestion for the Establishment: place a full page ad in all the major newspapers and contact all the major recruitment firms — requesting the CV’s of any and all persons who want to be considered for the world’s top job. Think of all the bright and able executives out there — intellectual and accomplished people in  business, academic and political circles. Think of all the opinion merchants like Krauthammer, Will and  Rove who seem to know everything there is to know. There must be somebody out there who’s ready for prime time. Nobody in the GOP Establishment asked Trump to run. He took the plunge anyway, like a Ninja Warrior leaping up the vertical wall. Instead of applauding the guy who has expanded the GOP base and galvanized the nation, the Establishment rulers  sulk, pout and nitpick. They don’t like the soldier in the trench. He’s not their hand-picked soldier. Picky, picky.